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Tuesday, January 31, 2017

WHEN SHE TURNED SHE SAW HER HUSBAND

A driver was driving his boss to the airport, on the way the boss noticed that he forgot an important document at home, so he decided to go back home to get the document. He finds his wife bathing with a soap on her face, the husband tip-toed and touched her boobs, the wife responded, and she said, 'Be patient now that you've dropped my stupid husband, we have the whole weekend to spend together, am praying for him to have a plane crash so that I can enjoy you till the end of my life'. She noticed the person was quiet, she washed her face and saw her husband standing in front of her...............see ya all tomorrow

Friday, January 13, 2017

DIARY OF A NEW WIFE


Monday: We are back from honeymoon and
settled in our new home, It's fun to cook for
my husband . I bought a Cookery Book, 
let me follow instructions; It says, 'Beat 12 eggs separately '.
 Well, I didn't have enough bowls to do that, so I had to borrow 12
bowls to beat the eggs in, the food turned out fine though.


Tuesday: We wanted a fruit salad for supper.The
recipe said, 'Serve without dressing'. So I didn't
dress. But my husband happened to bring a friend
home for supper that night. They both looked so
startled when I served them. I think it was the
salad.


Wednesday: I decided to serve rice and found a
recipe, which said, 'Wash thoroughly with hot water before
steaming the rice'. So I heated some water and took
a bath before steaming the rice. Sounded kind of
silly in the middle of the day. I can't say it
improved the rice anyhow.


Thursday: Today my husband asked for salad again. I
tried a new recipe. It said, prepare ingredients,
and then toss on a bed of lettuce one hour before
serving.' I hunted all over the place for a garden
with a bed of lettuce and when I got one, I tossed
my salad into the bed of lettuce and stood over
there for over one hour so the dog would not
take it. My husband  came over and asked if I felt all
right. I wonder why? He must be stressed at work;
I'll try and be supportive, don't you think.


Friday: Today I found an easy recipe for cookies.
It said, 'Put all ingredients in a bowl and beat it'.
Beat it I did, I went to my mother's place.
There must have been something wrong with the
recipe, because when I came back home again; it
looked the same as when I left it.


Saturday: My darling husband went shopping
 today and brought home a chicken.
He asked me to dress it for Sunday. 
I'm sure I don't know how hens dress. for
Sunday. I never noticed back on the farm, but I
found an old doll dress and its little cute shoes. I
thought the hen looked really cute. When my husband
saw the chicken, he started counting to ten. Either he was
really stressed because of his work, or he wanted
the chicken to dance. When I asked him what was
wrong he started crying and shouting out 'Why
me? Why me?'. What's wrong with my husband?

Tuesday, January 3, 2017

MAAFISA WAKAGUA LESENI ZA BAA USIKU!!!!

Mwenyekiti wa Chama cha Wahudumu wa Baa Tanzania (Chawabata), Ali Hussein (kulia), akizungumza na waandishi wa habari Dar es Salaam jana, wakati akipinga zoezi linalofanywa na Manispaa ya Ilala la kukagua leseni za wauza vileo usiku. Kushoto ni Katibu wa chama hicho, Boniface Lameck.